Have you ever wondered why business relationships can seem so tricky and hard to understand?
Every relationship has it own unique flavour and it’s own history and even it’s own rules. Many people find it difficult to understand the rules of work relationships and this can cause conflict and stress in the workplace.
After years of both working with personal and business relationships, I’ve discovered that there are some ways to make relating at work easier and more effective, without either giving away the farm or being too rigid. I’m a trained negotiator and mediator and find that those skills are invaluable to my business clients developing effective communications.
Many of our work relationship stresses come from fears and beliefs rooted in past experiences. We stress because we might be remember a past negotiation or communication that didn’t go so well and we don’t want to feel that way again. Many times the fear of being ripped off or taken for granted can control how we treat others. This pain from the past is influencing our decisions, unconsciously. We sometimes don’t even know where our feelings and decisions are coming from.
Over the years I have seen that people respond in their own way to different ways of working. For some the solution can lie with business relationship coaching which makes them feel more powerful in their work situation. For others they need to address some fears and anxiety that are rooted in the past and hypnotherapy and is the methods to changing those unconscious blocks. For yet others there are systemic issues that require a systemic solution from a business constellation.
The truth is that you have a unique business issue that may require a blend of different skills and experience if you are to reveal the underlying causes behind how you are relating and what is holding you or your business back from success and developing new answers with new solutions.
One of my clients was a well respected actor who was earning a low hourly rate. He didn’t feel comfortable asking for more as he didn’t know his own worth.
Objectively he knew how much he should be charging, but emotionally there were things in the way.
Within 6 months he had more than doubled his income through insights and strategies that he had learned in our sessions and he had a waiting list of people who wanted to hire him. His major issues stemmed from his inability to let go of some of the pain from his childhood. This past pain was also reflected in his current relationship, which was draining his energy.
Anther business client was a single dad musician struggling to earn enough for his family. After some emotional work done around his views about money and success, in a few months he could afford to rent a comfortable home for him and his children.
Another coaching client was faced with a multi-million dollar negotiation which threatened his business. He was being pressured by his legal advisors and the other person’s legal team. He felt emotionally unsupported and didn’t know what to do next. With all the legal advice he had lost site of what he wanted to create and felt like a pawn in the situation.
He needed someone who could support him to negotiate from a place of principle and stay true to what was of value to him. He said that pre-negotiation coaching made a huge difference.
It’s ok to put up your hand and get the help that you need: you and your issues are unique and required a tailored solution, that is true to your values and honours your needs to make a profit as well. You don’t have to choose between what your heart says and the bottom line. In fact, they can actually support one another if the business relationships are well managed.
Some business owners feel stuck in out dated managerial styles. They don’t want to seem weak by wanting to consult their staff, yet they understand that they don’t know the front line issues as well as those who are dealing with clients.
There are ways to be a strong leader and yet use the power of effective consultation.
You may need to avoiding burnout from over giving or giving in.
Many of us work in healing because we love the work that we do. Yet we can give so much that we feel drained and like we are working on empty. When the balance is out, all our relationship and even our health can suffer. The good news is, that you can have an even more successful business if you have balance in your life. It’s about finding your way to keep your energy tank topped up and learning when and how to say ‘no’ when you need to.
You’ve tried working harder, more hours and virtually live at your work. Your family and friends complain that you are never there. Even when you are there physically, you are thinking about work. Every solution that you have tried seems to give you more, not less work to do.
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